Not every week can be your best week I suppose and this one probably ranks real close to the bottom to be honest. Now I realize that I'm not the most positive person in the world or anything, but I guess this one was just worse or something.
P day went off without a hitch we had some fun and we taught 3 lessons on Monday so that we didn't have time to go to FHE which is kinda a blessing. It's always awkward anyway...
Then Tuesday was probably one of the worst days on of my mission. We had a long afternoon then when night came we had a lesson with Meg and she was just getting off work. We had two members coming with us to the lesson and the Brother Ellis was late and so we had to go sit outside the apartment complex on the picnic table and have the first part of the lesson.
We chit chatted for a second and then started to follow up on commitments and she told us that she had smoked and drank a glass of wine. Citing that Jesus would be fine with that because he drank wine. I literally haven't said anything at this point. Then Elder Steggell read 1 Nephi 3:7 and started to teach her the doctrine of being able to keep all the commandments. I asked her why she might think God would have us stay away from everything and she said, "Because when I drink and smoke I can feel it tear down at the spirit." Boom Golden. She totally understands. Then Brother Ellis called and asked where we were and I told him that we were out back so he came over and sat down. Then ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE. Meg looked at me and said "I'm so sick you and your cocky attitude. You always think you are so much better and you F***** aren't. Your problem is that you just need to realize you're an idiot. That's the other thing with you Mormons is that you don't accept anyone else's ideas.You Elder Funk are just so arrogant all the time and think you know everything" We just all sat there stunned and I was fuming. I was so livid. Then Brother Ellis jumped in and tried to calm the fire, then she let me have it again. I just sat there so upset. Then Elder Steggell asked her when we could meet again. She then glared at me and said Next Monday would be fine. She grabbed her purse looked at me and said "you are so F'ing Immature" then stormed off.
I was pretty ticked off, we went to another lesson after saying by to the members and I just was so ticked off.
Brother Ellis is one of my best friends in the ward and so he called us and asked to come to the next lesson with us and then took me and got me ice cream afterwords at baskin Robins. He probably saved my life that day.
It destroyed my week. I really just got so depressed. It is so hard to have someone you put so much love and time into, completely destroy everything that you try and do for them. I cannot imagine how parents feel, but I figure that I got a little taste of it. It was so hard. I really honestly am not good at alot of different aspects of missionary work, but I thought that loving people was something I was getting the hang of and it was shot down. It was so hard. I just found it super hard to get motivated to get out the door. I know this probably sounds stupid, but it really is just my life.
Then I was sitting in Sacrament meeting and we were singing the sacrament hymn and it hit me so hard once again that Jesus Christ really did already feel that. He felt how hurt I was, how much of a failure that I felt like. I know for sure that he paid the price. However I really don't think I wanted or desired to feel better. Sometimes it seems to almost feel good to feel bad. When I came home I was still just so sad, I hadn't talked all day long and Elder Snow grabbed me and talked to me for awhile. I really owe that kid so much. He helped me out immensely yesterday. I am so grateful when you need someone, to have someone. It is such a blessing.
It really was just a terrible week.
Then yesterday we got invited over for dinner at a member's house and they invited the sister's too. Yep that was weird. Luckily the sisters are the bomb and dinner was super fun. It's weird being around Single adults. It's like everyone just flirts all the time and stuff. But doesn't really want to date. Weird. Oh and they gave the dinner thought and it was like I was a member... They even left us with an invitation.
Oh I got called out on being sarcastic twice this week with members. Gosh Dang.
hmm.. Elder Steggell and I are staying here another transfer at least together so that means I will be here til at least when Ry leaves on his mission. I only have 4 transfers left which is nuts!
Hmm.. P day is going to be good. Staker is making me lunch today, and playing some basketball. It's gonna be dope. Oh and Elder Snow is taking me to dinner. Seriously when you are there for people in their time of need they flock to you when you need it! I love having cool friends. They are the best. This week I am going to be try and help another. I have a quote I see everyday that says "In all reality everyone is hurting on the inside, some people are just better at hiding it then others." It never hurt to do a nice thing for someone. Really.
Well I guess that's about it. Love ya lots!
Remember who you are and what He stands for!